Pick myself up, dust myself off, start all over again.

It's been a tough week for me this past week. It's difficult being upbeat and bubbly when you feel like your on an uphill struggle and thatla how this week has been for me. It all came to a head when I had a disaster of a singing lesson yesterday, just weeks away from audition time too. I guess we all have these days. Keeping your emotions out of your voice is very difficult as singing depends on physical snd mental control. I know it was just a bad day but it shakes your confidence.

I actually got some good news on Friday. I've been offered the understudy role of delilah for prestons production of samson and delilah next spring. It's good that I'll get to learn this role in full and it will be good experience in preparation for college learning for next year. Last week I was on a real high in regards to my voice as I had some great feed back in my last lesson and from Preston opera and a friend of mine heard me sing for the first time and it brought tears to her eyes to hear the sound I can actually make. Eveyone at work knows I,m an opera singer but few of them have heard me properly on recordings. Iwork is a separate world to my singing. When they have heard me they find it hard to comprehend that you can be good at something like this and yet not be good enough and it's a fine line which I'm walking. I don't know who I'll be up against for college places this year but I do know that competition is fierce and there are still only going to be a handful of winners and many disappointed people, I just don't want to be one of them again, despite all the great feed back I got last year!

Anyway, it's Sunday night and I'm not relishing the thought of getting back on the horse and starting to get back up that mountain of getting my mojo back but that's what needs doing. The clocks went back yesterday and it,a been pitch black since half five this evening and when this time of year comes around I have a strong desire to go in to hibernation, especially when it's dark going to work in the mornings and Dark when returning from work and it seems like you don't get to spend any time in the light.

The first battle of the week will be the struggle to get out of bed in the cold darkness of the morning, and if I can do that I'll make it through the next few weeks I'm sure.